Dear Jean Makers of the World,
I can think back to a time when the jean size I actually needed to wear was called "slim." Well those days have since come and gone due to things such as college and what is commonly known as the "freshman 15," the discovery of alcohol and 9 to 5 employment. To my dismay, you have brought back "the skinny jean" not as a necessity for some woman, rather a fashion trend which I contend is designed to make women feel bad about themselves.
And yet, they call to me...like a moth to a flame and if I happen to find my size it seems I cannot resist the urge to try them on, just to see...just in case. There is one similarity in all these jeans that I have come to realize and you, Jean Makers, have clearly overlooked. It is not just our waist lines that gets wider. It is an all over type of expansion, if you will. Increasing the waist band but leaving the leg hole openings a size 2 is never going to work for us.
When I returned the ridiculous pair of pants to the dressing room monitor she asked me in her oh so bubbly voice, "How did that work out for you?" In my mind I heard myself say, "For my self esteem? Wonders! Thanks for asking." But out loud I simply replied, "No thanks. Not today." Not today. Not any day.
In conclusion, I am not asking you to bring back palazzo pants because no one wants to see that disaster again but I am asking you to understand that no one deserves to feel and look like a sausage in their jeans. I think the women of America are with me.
Sincerely,
Heather
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I really am much funnier in person.
About Me
- Heather
- My name is Heather. I think only my husband and my mom read this blog. (Probably just my mom, though...when I force her to.) I am a case manager turned stay at home mama to a sweet baby boy. I make pumpkin pies from scratch and don't believe in soup from a can. I have been in love with my husband since I was 12 years old. I am not a morning person.
6 comments:
In eighth grade I had a pair of brown and black striped palazzo pants. They went with a coordinating paisley vest. I wore them with my sensible black loafers and my permed hair pulled half back. It was hot. Just thought I would share.
skinny jeans are poop
Ah, see Brittaney where we differ is that I wore my palazzos with a body suit...equally hot.
When are they gonna make "fatty jeans" that make you look hot even after eating too much ice cream?
Skinny jeans are fugly!
Seriously...but don't you mean fat with a "ph" :)
skinny jeans are for drug addicts, let's face it. I am not going to start doing lines of coke just so I can be trendy!
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