The new theme song for my life.

I am so inviting the girl on the right to my next birthday party.



For more hilarious singing, I recommend you check out the Bulgarian version of "William Hung" and first watch this and then this.

You know it is time to stop drinking when...

...you go to order your fourth drink of the night and you ask the bartender for an "Absolut Mandarin and Vodka."

Yes, can I have a little vodka with my vodka.

Conversations with Jessie

Voicemail message:

Um hey, it's me. I think I need to go to counseling or something because I can't seem to stop myself from lying to strangers. I don't know what my problem is, I guess I panic or something. I don't know, call me back.

Heather: Hey. I got your message. What are you talking about?
Jessie: I can't not lie to strangers.
Heather: Like that time you told the Mormon missionaries that came to the door you were not interested because we were moving to Montana?
Jessie: Yeah. And the time that that guy asked me about my "fighting Irish" temporary tattoo and I said it was because Dad went to Notre Dame.
Heather: So, what did you do this time?
Jessie: I was at Starbucks this morning and I was wearing running pants and running shoes and the barista asked me, 'Going for a run?' And I said 'Yeah.' Then he asked me how much I run and I said, 'I like to do about 2 miles a day. I am trying to work my way up.'
Heather: Jessie! You know all you have to say is, "No actually, I don't run. Thank you for my latte."
Jessie: I know.
Heather: Where do you get this from. It's not like Mom and Dad lie!
Jessie: I think I panic. Or maybe it is thrilling for me to see how far I can take the story....I have issues.