The whole time I was in Las Vegas, my friends kept saying things like, " I never want this trip to be over because then I will have to go back to reality!" By reality, they all meant etiher school or work. I would always respond with a deep breath, a shrug of my shoulders and an equally dissapointed "I know, that sucks!" It wasn't until about the fifth time I responded that way that I realized that my "reality" as they were refering to it, hasn't formed yet. As of right now, I no longer have to go to school, I have no job and the amount of time left on my health insurance coverage is rapidly diminishing. What these three things mean is that I have to grow up. I should be so ready for this. I mean I have been preparing for this day for the past 17 years. But as stupid as it sounds, the other day I was freaking out because I had no book I had to read, I had nothing to study and no papers to write. And I felt like that was a bad thing. So while Grant was at school all day yesterday, I wrote a complaint letter to Barnes & Noble Booksellers regarding an inappropriate display located in the children's section of the store, just so I could have that samefeeling of accomplishment after completing an assignment. I got so excited that about the letter and I was thinking about the different studies and Child Development gurus I could sight in my letter to prove to the management at the book store that I had earned my degree. I was really dissapointed when I realized that all the text books I did decided to save were at home rather than readily available for me to read once again. What the hell is wrong with me? Why am I doing this? Why do I want to know what grade I would have recieved had this letter actually been an assignment?

I guess what I am trying to say is the same thing I have been saying all along. School is something that has not just been a part of my life. Rather, being in school has been part of me, part of what I know and what I view as my reality for the past 17 years of my life. Being a student is all I know. In the past, when I was not in school I was on a break and the end of that break always meant school would start again. Well come September, I will not be attending any more classes. I am sure that many students goes through some similar kind of emotion and my realizations may seem just as dramatic and over analyzed as next graduate and after this I promise to stop talking about it. But I can't help feeling sad that school is over; it's like that part of Heather is over. I think I am really going to miss that part.